Burnt PopcornI cremated a bag of popcorn in my microwave...
and it's honestly not that bad...

but each individual piece tastes like a memory forgotten,
smokey and warm, like campfires in autumn...

if I close my eyes while the soft skin of the piece melts on my tongue,
I can imagine the crinkle of fire and the sparks of fallen ashes...
the miraculous image of twirling smoke against Orion's Belt...

And the harsh, reawakening sounds of pulling the individual black pieces of wood back into the center, raking the powdery ashes into a circle, and realigning every smokey brick...

And even though we never shared a campfire before, I really would like to..

Your Feline Shadow...Go ahead and tell me,
Your darkest deepest fear,
Whisper it, type it slow,
And never let them hear…
Because you know how much I care,
You know what I really mean,
And because I care so deeply,
You're secret's safe with me.

Go ahead and tell me,
Who you really love,
Whisper it, and type it slow,
And never let them know…
Because you know that I still care,
So I'll never tell you no,
I'll support your whims on hand,
And never to let go.

So go ahead and tie the string,
Draw the face of my true soul,
Tickle, laugh, and trick me, boy,
But you have to know,
That these games make it difficult,
They make it oh so hard&#

True Love: A Painted Myth?Forgive me if I intrude,
If I'm a little bold,
I've always been a little odd,
From all that I've been told…
But something about the way you smile,
Something about the way you trust,
Good Lord, send me a soul to love,
And forget this useless lust…
So many tiring hours spent,
Looking for his name…
Trying to find a hint,
If he's still the same…
I could have been the secret girl,
Chosen at a whim,
I threw my heart at his chest,
But still, I did choose him…
I don't know what is real anymore,
My mind does war against me,
Somehow I must get the patience,
To tame the visions that taint me.
So please forg

The Bitter Nightmare/Too Heavy A BurdenRusted daggers flung from their tongues,
Deep, infected scars reopened,
Tear away the skin above my breast,
And witness my heart's weak thrum.

You, you have made it so,
You poisoned it with your truthful tonic,
Your tampered quotes and encrypted sneers,
Do not twine the needle deeper,
Fling your hair through the seeping blood,
Paint the canvas of my years,

Falling from the chasm's edge,
Releasing my mind from the bitter nightmare,
I watch the sun comb its way through the trees,
And struggle to stand against the bars of home,

My hands and feet chained, a dusty cloth between my teeth,
I wait for the warden's glance,
That moment

To Kiss A GhostSlowly the drug pulls down my veins,
Pulling my hand in purpled waters,
Dragging me down into a misty realm,
Of lavender smoke…

Landing in a chilled crystal lake,
The ripples lapping against my legs,
I lift my eyes and see someone…
A shadow of... someone…

He reaches out a hand to me and touches my neck,
With the other, pulls me closer…
It was like kissing a ghost,
He was there, and then... he wasn't…

I never met his true self,
But I knew him then, and only then…

My hair ruffled through his fingers,
Rough and red,
His skin was cool and fading,
Blissful blue…

I never knew what it was&#

I Am Your Clockwork DollLay me out on the table and open my eyes,
Peel back the skin and reveal my porcelain heart,

Like a clockwork doll, made in secret from the mountains,

A lock is encased in its center,
And the key was lost long ago…
Given to a man of a name I've never known…

You play music of the sweetest notes,
Stories of love and devoted trust…
Love I don't deserve…
Love I can only give away…

What a truthful night it has been for this doll,
Every heart spoke its truth,
And she nearly cried from her shock…
So much love and care,
From those she's never met…never known…

Her crystal blood flows freely now,
W

Uncertainty and DoubtDoes anyone else stand at the edge of the stair and look down,
wondering what it would feel like to never know how far the next step is?
As if you could walk blindly, and fall, sink, down into an un-foretold reality,
Lose yourself in chaos, the bitter chilled unknown…

I stand here now on the edge of porcelain stairs,
Peeking downward through my ebony lashes,
I feel a grip in my spirit,
A sickening wave of dizziness rolls over me,
Knocking me back, nudging doubt deeper into my skin like a poisonous shard.
"Do I step forward? Or do I wait in this haunting pain…"

Biting my lip, wringing my hands, my blood dancing loudly,

My Morning BattleI look in the mirror,
Apply that last bit of eye make-up…
Twist the brush,
Swoop the glittery powder…
Standing back and smiling,
My reflection retorts….distorts…

I hear a hiss in my ear,
"Look at you, you love every person who talks to you... so pathetic…so naiive…so trusting…..such a fool."

I close my eyes tightly, I grip the edge of the counter, my knuckles white.
"Look at you, you don't know when to stop do you?.....so eager…so loving…so innocent…such a fool."

I bite my lip and refuse to look at h

What I FeelHave you ever burned an incense cone or wand,
And afterwords,
It's so light and only a fragile form of ash?
The slightest touch disintegrates it,
Sending it to fall down,
And becoming too much to clean…

I feel like that.

Have you ever broken a glass jar,
Just enough to see the shatter-lines,
But it still retains its shape?
The slightest touch will destroy it,
Causing it to release glimmering daggers,
Waiting to be stepped on for their revenge…

I feel like that.

Have you ever touched a frozen layer of water,
Tried to lift it from the bowl,
Tried to keep it from breaking it's original crystal form?
The slightest touc

My Label/ Hi, My Name Is...Sometimes I think I need to wear a label,
A sticker,
A collar,
A tag…

That will tell you what is wrong with me…

"Hi, My Name Is:
Easily loving, falls to quickly, doesn't know when to stop, tries her best but can't succeed, and only wants to hold someone's hand… to feel that hand on her shoulder when she cries…"

The ink would be smudged across as if written in haste, a couple letters bolded in spots as if trying to fix a mistake…So many mistakes…

The edges would be peeling as if to forget I ever existed all together…
Sometimes, I think I need to wear a warning…

So you will know ahead of time th

The Letter My Parents Will Never ReadThe words just slip through my teeth, now,
They dance out of my throat and coat my tongue,
The lies.
"I'm fine."
"I don't like that anymore"
"I'm still the same person"
"I'm not mad at you"
"Everything's fine"
I've gotten so good at lying, now,
I sometimes can't tell when even I'm telling the truth.
"Sure, everything's good"
"See? I'm smiling"
"I haven't had my first kiss"
"I'm fine."
"I'm fine."
"I'm fine."

You know what?
I'm not fine.
I have to hide my heart from my own parents because they don't understand.
I have to pretend that I'm mad at him and have "repented from my ways".
But in reality, I wait to read his words

CanvasThe staining ink of your darkest Sharpie,
The bitter scent both relaxing and startling…
The gentle tug of felted tips and pen on skin…
Just rest my head down,
Let the shivers take me,
I wish you could experience something similar,
But I wouldn't know how to explain,
How wonderful it feels,
When I become your canvas.

Closing my eyes,
I listen to your steady breaths,
Your soft but precise movements on my skin,
My arm stretched across the cool wood,
My knuckles lightly touching your chest…
I think, if I lay still enough,
I can feel your heartbeat through my skin…
When you set that ink upon my skin,
I forget a

Here, In My HandsH e r e
In my hands…
Barely holding on to my flushed fingertips,
Is a dream.

Just an ordinary day dream,
One held precious and known only to me…
But within this fantasy, is a hidden promise…
A promise and a question,

H e r e
I cup my hands and let the starlight ruffle it's feathers,
Like a bird of thread, with eyes of gold…
Do you understand how fragile it is?
If you unravel it enough, you will find what's left of my heart,
Since I broke it in two for you.

H e r e
Underneath this twilight canvas,
I hold my hands up to you and watch your eyes change,
Don't you understand…

Juliet's Curse,My Own...Music used to be my aide…
Now it only makes it worse...
A star-crossed lover by trade,
This longing heart a curse…

How is it possible to feel this much pain…
To go to sleep crying his name,
Someone please, I'm begging you,
Tear out my heart, stitch up the skin.

It's like a venomous hole burning through my lungs,
A boiling thrum through my veins,
Hot tears cool my skin, and taint my tired lips,
I'm begging you, tell me the cure…

Where is the cure that Juliet swallowed?
What is the potion that let her sleep?
And did she feel like me….
I'm begging someone, anyone,

To tell me how… how to breathe and

Haunted Fields of IndigoWhy do I find myself wandering these haunted fields,
Following a shadow of a spirit...

Pulled by the barbed wire wrapped around my throat,
and the poison threatening my blood....

Desperate glances behind, remind me,
that I can't help the way I feel...

But why do I find my self confessing my heart's true song,
To a moon that will never hear...

Here I am, my knees bloodied and torn in the dried, tarnished straw,
I can only imagine the luscious taste of sweet moon's light...

But here I am, bound by my love, bound for all eternity,
my love for those who cannot return it to me...

I will never find my way,
out of these haunted fields

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The Who's Not Mad? GameTime to play "Who's Not Mad?"
And put on my happy face,
Dress happy,
Put on makeup happy,
Fix my hair happy,
Do favors happy,
Talk happy,
Work happy,
Smile happy...
happy, happy, happy.....
You lose if you try to show what you're really feeling.

If you really want to scream in her face,
Pull her hair,
Curse at her,
yell at her, Get...away...from...her....
Or just want her to stop and voice your opinion on ANY matter,
You lose, understand?
You have to be happy,
And pretend.
That everythings fine...
So let's play a game,
of "Who's Not Mad?"
Doesn't it sound fun?

If You Want WarIf you want a war,
Then you're gonna get it,
I can play your game,

Stop messing with my head,
Making me think you mean it,
If you'll never change.
I don't want to scream and cry,
And I really don't want to lie:

If you want a war,
Then you're gonna get it,
Just don't waste my time.

If you say you'll never trust me,
If you say our love has changed,
If you say you'll never see me,
As a daughter in your mind,
Then fine:

If you want a war,
Then you're gonna get it,
Just don't waste my time.

If you walk by me,
And I by you,
And we never speak,
The tension in the air is static,
And you know what that means?

I don't think I c

Strong Enough...A shivering breath,
A chill on the skin,
The continuous twittering of the southern crickets,
And a little girl, curled in her bed.

Just a little brown-headed girl,
All tucked in without a care,
Her dreams take her across the world and under the sea,
With Disney-fied promises of true love and happy endings.

How simple it really was,
Back before that girl became me…
She used to fantasize and dream during both turns of the Sun,
And never feared anything or anyone.

She loved both her mother and her father,
Her little baby sister and her pups and kittens,
She loved everything.
She knew nothing.

That little brown-headed girl ne

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It's What I'm Here For

by ~topazcat511, Sep 16, 2012, 9:17:22 AM
Literature / Prose / Non-Fiction / Emotional

Last night, I dreamt that a friend of mine was crying.
The tears of his confusion so beautiful against his cheek...
His eyes so hurt, so lost....
I needed to help him....to be there for him...
I spent the whole night dreaming that we sat somewhere as we were lost in the darkness of our feelings,
holding him together,
keeping him from falling apart....
I didn't want to do anything else,
he needed me...
There wasn't any talk of confused kisses,
Or quick jokes to cheer up his wonderful smile,
We just sat there together....
My pale hand across his face,
drying the tears of yet another lost heart....

That's what I'm here for I guess....To love all, with all my heart.....and fall apart myself, as I hold everyone else together....

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~guitarangel1495 Sep 20, 2012

beautifully written, the last line breaks my heart

~topazcat511 Sep 21, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

thank you

~swootness13 Sep 16, 2012

This is beautiful...I know exactly how you feel

~topazcat511 Sep 16, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

I'm glad, thank you ^_^

~Kailani-e Sep 16, 2012 Student Traditional Artist

Amazing. I believe you're right. ^^

(And I think the title is supposed to say "It's What I'm Here For" not "It What I'm Here For")

~topazcat511 Sep 16, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

crap, thanks XD I don't know why I didn't catch that XD

~Kailani-e Sep 16, 2012 Student Traditional Artist

xD No problem

~BlackNightStar Sep 16, 2012 Hobbyist Traditional Artist

so beautifull

i love it

~topazcat511 Sep 16, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

I'm glad :3

~BlackNightStar Sep 16, 2012 Hobbyist Traditional Artist

you´re are a really good writer +.+

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It's What I'm Here Forby ~topazcat511

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